Wednesday, September 28, 2016

Watermelonoma

Welp I guess I have something called a Watermelonoma.
It's not all fun and games being a naked wiener dog. Oh sure I have a fabulous wardrobe, I get massages and skin treatments but sometimes there are downsides too.
I can get infections sometimes and yesterday I had to go to the vet to get an infection on my keister checked out.
Talk about embarrassing!!!
Turns out it's not a regular infection but a watermelonoma! 
The vet said this watermelon is growing  on my booty and could get big and dangerous so I'm having Brazilian butt lift and getting it removed!
My mom is jealous! She said if she could have some junk in her trunk removed she would be so happy!
She must be REALLY jealous because she started to cry when the vet told us about it. Mom is weird!

Friday, March 4, 2016

This Beauty Comes at a Price

Yip Yap Friends!

Sometimes I see my friend say, "Wow! A NAKED WIENER! I wish I was nakey too!!!"


While I appreciate the adoration for all of my super cuteness, I must say 2 very important things.

1. YOU ARE PERFECT THE WAY YOU ARE!!

God made all of us uniquely different. You may have long flowing hair or short shiny fur. You may have a super long snoot or perfectly coiffed butt swirls. You may have sparkly white teefs or perhaps the lack of dental structure causes your lovely bubble gum colored tongue to protrude proudly from your jaw.



The simple truth is: We doggies are all beautiful no matter our size or shape.

2. THIS BEAUTY COMES AT A PRICE!!

Being naked has its privileges. For example, I have an amazing wardrobe and I do stick out in a crowd but there are a few negatives as well.

Every day I have to take a bath. Every. Single. Day. Just let that soak in for a moment. (ha ha..soak in...get it?)                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      

Baths are ok...but sometimes I just want to skip it. Hang out in my jammies and say "screw the bath mom!"

Unfortunately, because of my skin I am prone to bad infections so mom has to wash me.

Every week I have to get scrubbed with a brush that sort of hurts. It is to remove blackheads that accumulate on my skin. If I don't get them scrubbed then they get real big and sores will form.

In the winter I have to be decked out in about 5 layers of clothes just to pee and in the summer mom has to lather me down with lotion just so I don't get sunburned.

So....while I am happy to be me, happy to be unique, happy my family takes such good care of me I wanted to explain that it isn't all fun and games around here.

If you ever hear someone say, "I wish I had a naked dog" be sure to tell them that being naked comes with some special needs, lots of extra work, money for a fancy wardrobe, allergies, a much higher risk for seizures and cancer, and baths. Lots and lots of baths!

This beauty comes at a price.

Here is a video of my beauty routine.