Thursday, December 5, 2013

Music from the Trash Heap

Mom and I were just snuggling in the Big Bed like normal but then she did something MEAN! 

She changed the tv channel. She knows I love animal planet but she wanted to watch HER show. 

Ugh. How rude!

I pouted for a while but after a few minutes my ears started twitching and then my snoot stuck out of the blanket.

The story on the news show was very interesting to me.
It told of a town called Cateura in a country called Paraguay. Roxy said it is near her homeland of Colombia. 

The story was about the very poor children who live there, in a town that is basically a big trash heap. In spite of their surroundings, the local children have found a way to make instruments out of the trash they live in and have now become famous worldwide by playing beautiful music.

Mom was crying when she was watching this show and I already knew what she was thinking about.

This was just another example of people overcoming their circumstances and taking something ugly and turning it into something beautiful.

Animal rescue is VERY UGLY. It can be so disheartening and sad. There are people that do such horrible things. 

Most times it feels like it would just be easier to give up; to just walk past the trash heap.

But just remember the music you will be missing out on…and the beauty that the world will not get to see.

Do not fear going into that trash heap and pulling out something that may seem ugly to the world. 

With a little love and attention, it will show its beauty and value to the world.

To learn more about The Landfill Orchestra Click Here.


This blog is dedicated to Rosie and her mom Cinnamon. Rosie….I will love you forever.

Tuesday, November 12, 2013

Mom Went and Got a Job!

So my mom went and got herself a job! No one cleared this ambitious en-devour with muah and it has left me feeling a bit upset. One day my mom was home rubbing my belly like always and the next she trotted out the door just after breakfast and left me home with dad! This has been going on two weeks now and although I admit I have been able to trick dad into more treats....I am still very sad about mom not being here during the day.

I have tried barking at her about this but she gave me some lame excuse about needing the money to buy doggy kibble. I have yet to see any of this so called kibble so I think that was just dog doo doo.

I really need your advice friends. How can I make my mom feel as guilty as possible?

I may not be able to get her to quit her new job but I do believe I should be getting something out of this new employment of hers. I need some new dresses and I would love some comfy new jammies.

How would you go about making your hooman feel bad?

Each evening I have been trying my hardest to pout but my darned tail keeps wagging as soon as I see her and the next thing I know I'm licking her all over.

How can I stick to my guns? What techniques work best?

Please write back as soon as possible....I'm desperate!

Wednesday, August 7, 2013

A Rude Awakening

When you are a naked dachshund who absolutely abhors getting wet, a rainy day means one thing; NAP!

So this morning when the angry grey sky decided to open up and empty out on us, I decided to curl up next to mom in bed and take a snooze.

I did my normal routine. Walked on her a little bit, licked her nose and face to see if I could glean any remnants of her breakfast off of her face, and then hopped down and burrowed under the blankies to close my eyes and dream of chipmunk chasing.

In only a few short seconds I was transported to a wonderful dream. I was on hunting duty in the back yard decked out in the cutest hunting garb I have ever seen. It was as though it was made especially for me! It was cammo green but had a few little pops of pink in it since pink is my favorite color. The pink spots were flowers so I guess I was supposed to look like a camouflaged bush. Tee hee.

Anyway the outfit came with a cute hat…and I usually don’t like hats but this one was very comfortable and had a wide brim to keep the sun out of my eyes and help me see those nasty little chipmunks even better. I felt cute! I felt confident! I felt ready to attack!

Austin was to my right and Spike was too my left. Our tails were wiggling fast but mostly straight up….the quiver it is called. This is the signal that we are just about to make our move.

Mr. Chipmunk….A.K.A. LUNCH…appeared and we all took off! Spike’s roll is to keep him from going back towards his hole. Austin barks like crazy to try to stun the little thing while chasing him strategically toward me. I have the best job. I get to grab the little sucker and throw it up into the air by its tail! Then we all take turns getting little bites of him. MMMMMM YUM! If you’ve never had fresh chipmunk you do not know what you are missing.

So now came the big moment! We were all getting ready to enjoy our spoils when I was RUDELY AWAKENED FROM MY AWESOME DREAM!

“Karli, Karli…since it is raining you should work on writing a blog!” my mom said.

Ugh! Hasn’t she ever heard the old adage “Let sleeping dogs lie”

Tonight when she is dreaming about eating chocolate I'm gonna wake her up and tell her I need to go pee! Tee hee!

Friday, July 26, 2013

Michigan Air

Welp...I know I am in trouble with many of you because I have been quite negligent in my bloggy writing.
Mom has been telling me that my friends have been asking me to paw out something inspiring but honestly something sorta weird has been happening to me since we got to Michigan.

I can't really explain it. I will try my hardest to put it into words but it is as though my soul has been given wings and all I want to do is play, play, play!!!!! Mom says it has something to do with the Michigan air (which sounds like a bunch of psycho babble mumbo jumbo to me) but maybe she is right because my end-orphans are going crazy! End-orphans are things you get when you were once an orphan (or felt like one) and now that your aren't an orphan anymore you are so happy you get tingly feelings. Well....since I was adopted I am happy often...but in is magnified!!!!

I have been chasing squirrels and chipmunks. I have been rolling in the most heavenly scented fish guts that the cabin rental folks are kind enough to leave behind for me. Following the loveliest butterflies up and down the hills in the yard from flower to flower and barking my most ferocious bark at anyone who dares get too close to my Grammy and Grampy's fence.

I guess it is also what I HAVEN'T been doing that may seem a bit strange to some. I have not had a single pedicure since I arrived! I have only had a few baths..and the ones I have had were because mom said I stunk too bad to sleep with her in the big bed. Tee hee. I have not been wearing my normal couture clothing but rather t-shirts to cover my skin from the sun and bugs. I guess it would be considered "country wear" but I have been sooooo comfy! A few days when it was really hot mom just lathered me up with bug spray and sunscreen and i walked around butt naked! So liberating!

I am still me. I am still Karli the Naked Wiener. I still have the same dreams, hopes and desires but I guess I am learning to enjoy the simple things in fresh blueberries...yum!

Monday, June 10, 2013

Penelope's Weird Cold

Often we share tips and advice on different medical ailments that plague doxies such as IVDD, luxating patellas, hypothyroidism, even bad breath. Today, however, i am not sharing information about a doxie illness but rather asking for your HELP!

My hoo-sister Penelope is seventeen. She will be eighteen very soon and mom says we should love on her as much as possible because when she has her birthday she is gonna ‘disappear’! I didn’t know that was even really possible. I mean...I have seen magic on T.V. but I always really thought there was a trap door or something behind the curtain. I didn’t know people could really vanish.

Penelope says that mom is just over-reacting and that she isn’t gonna disappear but rather move to California to ‘follow her dreams’. That sounds like fun to me! I would love to move to California and become a famous Doxie Model and Star like Mila Miesner....but alas I am now a married woman and will have to be happy in my role as wife and spokes-model for The Long Dog Retreat.

Mom says Penelope isn’t being realistic about life but then again what teenager is?  

My biggest concern about my hoo-sissy is this weird cold she has and that is what I need your help with.

A few months ago I notice she seemed to be sniffing more and well...excuse the gross fact but ehem...picking at her nose.

I licked her nose to help her out, (I am nice like that.) and what to my surprise...I discovered the oddest boogers ever!!!


Has anyone ever heard of this? What causes this? How can I get them out of there? I keep licking and licking and licking but they won’t budge. They don’t seem to be getting smaller either!

Poor girl. She looks ridiculous!

I hate to tell her....she is so pretty otherwise. Do you think this is permanent? Fatal?

Any advice would be appreciated.



Tuesday, June 4, 2013

Lil Bit's Dew Claw Song

Blood trails! Horrible cries! Moaning and chaos! Was this a murder scene? Had a major natural disaster just taken place such as a tornado or earthquake?

No. This was just my kitchen, I realized as I crawled out of a warm pile of yet unfolded towels in the laundry basket. 

Something WAS seriously wrong however; my brother Lil Bit was carrying on like someone had just stepped on his scrawny, mostly hairless tail. 

Lil Bit doesn't cry like most doxies. We call him Monkey Boy  because he makes an “oooo aaaaa oh oh oh oh oh” sound. Mom says if people were blind folded they would think they were in the primate house of the zoo.

“What is the matter Lil Bit?!!!” I ran over and sniffed his heiney for more information.

“I stubbed my toe and my right dew claw got ripped off!!! OOOOO AAAAA OH OH OH OH OH!!!!!” he yelped loudly and continued. “And now I can’t find it.”

“Welp you can’t glue it back on ya know?” I informed him.

“I just want it. It has been attached to me for 14 years! OOOOO AAAAA OH OH OH OH OH” he cried again red blood dripping from his still fresh wound.

“Ok…I will help you find it! “ I volunteered. “But instead of crying…why don’t you turn your pain into something positive!”

“Huh?” Lil  Bit asked.

“Sing a song about you dew claw! It will release those end dor fins mom is always talking about to make your paw feel better! Also…your monkey cry is driving me nuts!” I explained.

“Ok…I will try.” Lil Bit agreed.

This is Lil Bit’s Dew Claw Song....sung to a country western tune. 

I was strolling through the kitchen, looking for a treat,
A piece of cheese or sausage or any kind of meat.
I stubbed my toe on somethin’, don’t really know at all
But I felt a mighty awful pain and ripped off my dew claw!

Oh dew claw I loved you. I've had you all my life.
Some folks say your pointless but they aren't right.
When you’re a doxie with no teeth, that extra claw helps hold your meeeaaaatttt!!!
Oh dew claw, my right dew claw, I’ll miss you so.

And now my paw is bloody and making quite a mess.
I just dripped blood all over mommy’s favorite dress
I need to find you dew claw before this day ends
I’ll keep you for forever, cuz you been such a great friend

Oh dew claw I loved you. I’ve had you all my life.
Some folks say your pointless but they aren’t right.
When you’re a doxie with no teeth, that extra claw helps hold your meeeaaaatttt!!!
Oh dew claw, my right dew claw, I’ll miss you so.

Now mom just walked through the door, and sees the awful mess
I’m gonna get a spankin’ for ruinin her dress.
Wait, she picked me up and hugged me, gave me kiss.
I guess she knows how much my dew claw I will miss!

Oh dew claw I loved you. I’ve had you all my life.
Some folks say your pointless but they aren’t right.
When you’re a doxie with no teeth, that extra claw helps hold your meeeaaaatttt!!!
Oh dew claw, my right dew claw, I’ll miss you so.

She cuddled me and wiped me off and told me cry no more
Mom put me down and helped me track my blood across the floor
Back to where I stubbed my toe, the scene of the crime.
And there I found my dew claw, it once again is mine!

Oh dew claw I loved you. I’ve had you all my life.
Some folks say your pointless but they aren’t right.
When you’re a doxie with no teeth, that extra claw helps hold your meeeaaaatttt!!!
Oh dew claw, my right dew claw, I’ll miss you soooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!

I followed Lil Bit's trail of blood back to where he stubbed his toe and reunited him with his dew claw. 

He ate it.

The End.

 The music and lyrics of this song will be released soon by our dear friends Nik Liszewski and sung by Trish Kackritz!!!  (Nuit Doxie Liszewski's parents)

Wednesday, May 22, 2013

Why God?

I watched the news with momma and saw all of the houses and buildings smashed from the twister in Oklahoma. It was so sad. All of those people’s homes were gone and their cars got piled up and even some schools were demolished! Mom said about 25 people died in the storm including little hoomans and lots of pets were missing from their families. I could tell momma was very upset so I climbed on her lap and licked her eyes.

“Mom, why does stuff like this happen?” I asked her.

“Oh Karli…that is such a good question little doggy,” she said. “Honestly, I have no idea.”

“But God had a reason right?” I asked again.

“Karli…I would like to believe that…and I do believe the Bible that says “And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.” But Karli I don’t believe God caused this storm. I believe he allowed it.

“Mom….if God is all powerful and all knowing….couldn’t he have just made a world without storms and suffering?

“Sweet baby girl…you are too cute! He DID! Wow I really need to read to you more. Genesis 1:31 says “Then God looked over all he had made, and he saw that it was very good!” He created a perfect world. There was no sin or suffering. No storms or mean people. But then after God created man, Satan entered into the scene and now even today we have to pay the consequences.

“So…why didn’t God just make it so we always just obey and love Him and then everything would be perfect!” I suggested smartly.

Mom smiled but then explained, “Karli if Austin was programmed to love you….it wasn’t his choice…he just loved you because it was the way he was made, how would that make you feel?”

“Not very special because it wouldn’t be true love.” I replied.

“That is why God gave us free will.” Mom explained. “He didn’t want little robots. He wanted authentic beings who had the choice to follow Him or not, to believe in Him or not, to love Him or not. He loves all of us though Karli, not just those that love Him and I know that His heart is broken over the tornadoes in Oklahoma. He knows even when a single bird falls from the sky, so he surely knows and is hurting over all of the pain and devastation there,” mom said.

I still am not sure why all of these bad things happen but I am glad that God loves me and that He didn’t make these things happen but rather allows them to happen. I am encouraged to see the stories of all the nice things people are doing to help each other…especially how they are helping lost pets find their families.
Karli loves to hear from her fans! Don't forget to leave a comment below!

Thursday, May 9, 2013

The Villages

Last weekend was Wienerpalooza. It was completely pawsome and i promise to write a special blog or two all about it but today I want to tell you about something that happened on our drive home.
We were on I-75 north. The wieners were sleeping...except for me. I was looking out the window and reading the signs. I wanted to be sure mom knew where she was going. I liked  the names of the towns...some of them made giggle. We went through a town called Fruitville. Another town was named Citra. Mom and Ms. Angela stopped there and bought some orange juice and grapefruit. They didn’t buy me anything but i did get to go potty. That was nice.
A weird thing happened in Citra. Hundreds of tiny bugs were swarming in the air and hitting our windshield. They were getting stuck to our windows and headlights. Mom was using the window washers...but they made such a yucky mess. She said they were love bugs because they were kissing....but I looked real close and I think she is wrong. Or if she is right...they do not know how to kiss because it looked like they had their heineys hooked together! Tee hee!
Up the road I was getting sleepy but I opened my left eye and saw a sign...I almost fell asleep but then memories of a commercial featuring happy people zipping around on golf carts and riding bikes jolted me awake!

"Mom! Mom! Bark! BARK BARK BARK! Look it is The Villages....America’s Friendliest Home Town. We have to stop! We should move there!!!"

"Karli...The Villages is a place where old people live!"

"Well, you are old, right?" I asked.

"!" she barked back.

"You look old." I replied.

Then for some reason...Angela laughed and mom didn’t talk to me until we got to our hotel that night!

Karli loves to hear from you! Leave her a comment below! 

Thursday, February 28, 2013

The Friendly Way to Unfriend a Friend

Yip Yap Friends!

Did you know I haven't written a blog since LAST YEAR! I know right? What is up with that?
I have been busy. My dad has gone to Afghanistan for a year so all of us around the Landgraf Pack have added duties to attend to.

I have much blogging to catch up on but today I have a bone to pick and I want to pick it apart with you!

I think it will be easiest to discuss this as a story; so here goes.

Mr. Beagle and Ms. Pug were Facebook friends. They were also mutual Facebook friends with Miss Goldendoodle. One day, Mr. Beagle and Ms. Pug got in an argument. They decided to not be Facebook friends anymore. Miss Goldendoodle; hearing both sided of the argument decided that she was going to "unfriend" Mr. Beagle.

What is the purpose of unfriending on Facebook? Well, I think there are many good reasons. Perhaps you have very opposing viewpoints. For example, you LOVE cheese and he/she joined CHEESE HATERS OF AMERICA. That could cause problems in a relationship. Or maybe it just seems that you can't be kind to each it is just best to "unfriend". There is always the possibility that you became friends with someone under false pretenses and now need to rectify the situation. For became friends with someone called, "Wiener Lover" and well....they didn't mean dachshunds!

I believe it is our right to unfriend or block folks/doggies on Facebook. 

The really NICE thing about unfriending someone is that it is very discreet. There are no headlines, flashing lights or mean spirited dissing. Chances are unless the person only has 1 friend...they won't even notice you've unfriended them.

So??? What is my point? Where is this bone I want to pick?

It is when Mr. Beagle...or the "unfriended" party decides to complain about being unfriended by posting on his wall that "Miss Goldendoodle Just Unfriended Me".

What is the purpose of this post? It can only be for one reason. To make other doggies, who may or may not know the reasons for the unfriending in the first place, feel sorry for Mr. Beagle and become upset with Miss Goldendoodle.

It is Facebook Tattletaling.

And it is ridiculous!

Do not become a Facebook Tattletale!

If someone "unfriends" you:

1. Suck it up buttercup.
2. If you are really upset and don't know the reasons...message the person privately and ask.
3. Realize...that not all people/doggies will agree with each other on all things.
4. Embrace less drama in your life.
5. Cherish the friends you do have all the more!!!

P.S.  If you unfriend me...I'm gonna hunt you down and make your life miserable. BOL!! Just kidding. :)